| Hey
            there, hi there, ho there! Youre as welcome as can be to the
            sweet sixteenth installment of Jahnke's
            Electric Theatre. Odds are good that, if you've been
            paying any attention whatsoever to what's been playing at your local
            cinema, you may be wondering what I could possibly have to
            recommend. August and September are pretty grim months for new
            releases. Not quite as grim as January but still, the pickings get
            mighty slim. So it should come as no surprise that most of the
            positive reviews this time out come from movies handily available to
            you on Digital Video Disc. Rent them and be pleased, starting with
            this week's... 
 
 The
            A-Picture - The Corporation
 
 So over the past couple of years, I've recommended all sorts of
            wacko left-wing documentaries to friends and family. This is the
            price that must be paid for having the dimmest bulb on the Christmas
            tree in the Oval Office. The left has no real power but at least we
            can make a zillion movies complaining about it. But I'll admit, many
            of these wacko left-wing documentaries, while they are chock full of
            valuable information, leave a lot to be desired in terms of
            cinematic aesthetics. The Corporation
            is a happy exception. Directed by Mark Achbar and Jennifer Abbott,
            The Corporation examines the
            history, purpose and agenda of the corporation from its inception
            back in the post-Civil War days to today. Taking the law at its
            word, Achbar and Abbott look at corporations as if they were people
            and, after applying basic psychoanalytic principles to corporate
            behavior, come to the conclusion that the modern corporation fits
            the profile of the textbook psychopath. This is a fascinating movie
            with serious, pointed discussions of economics, the environment,
            politics, sociology, and ethics. But unlike a lot of recent angry,
            left-leaning documentaries, this one actually succeeds as a movie.
            It's shot well, edited extremely well, and has a very good musical
            score. It's a long movie, clocking in at around two-and-a-half
            hours, but it needs to be, given the amount of information packed
            into the film. As our every waking moment becomes ever more 
            influenced by corporations, this film is a must-see. It's
            informative, sometimes darkly funny, and often chilling. It may very
            well be the most eye-opening film you see this year.
            (*** ½)
 
 
 The Cave
 
 Meanwhile, on the other end of the spectrum... a scientific
            expedition discovers a vast network of underground caves. A team of
            buff, North-Face-catalog-ready scientists lead by Cole Hauser (son
            of Wings, needless to say) heads down below to explore the cave and
            are surprised to be greeted by a welcome wagon of scary monsters.
            The Cave is exactly what it
            claims to be. Monsters in a cave. If you like to see movies about
            monsters in a cave, you might not hate this. I didn't, but on the
            other hand, I didn't really like it either. I've seen this story
            about a gazillion times and this telling was no better and no worse.
            Oddly enough, I may have enjoyed The Cave
            more if it had been just a little worse. If it were really, really
            bad, it would have at least been memorable and kind of funny. As it
            is, it's just another 90 minutes out of my life that I'll struggle
            to remember a few months down the road. (**)
 
 
 The Constant Gardener
 
 Ralph Fiennes is a mild-mannered diplomat out of Africa who is
            forced to take off his blinders and address the corruption around
            him when his pregnant activist wife (Rachel Weisz) is murdered.
            Based on a novel by John Le Carre, The
            Constant Gardener is a superior political thriller and,
            if you absolutely feel the need to hit the theater, this is one of
            your best bets. But if I'm being absolutely honest, it was a little
            snoozy for my tastes, running out of gas about midway through before
            picking up steam again for the tense finale. Fiennes is excellent,
            as is Weisz in one of her first really juicy roles, but Danny Huston
            is miscast as Fiennes superior. Most of the movie looks great,
            although it goes a little too far with the handheld shaky-cam stuff
            when it isn't really necessary. The
            Constant Gardener was directed by Fernando Meirelles and
            if you haven't seen his previous film, the Oscar-nominated City
            of God, I'd recommend you rent that instead and wait for
            this to come out on video. City of God
            is a great film. This one is merely good. (***)
 
 
 In Good Company
 
 Dennis Quaid is a middle-aged salesman for a sports magazine whose
            life is thrown into crisis mode with the arrival of his new, much
            younger corporate boss (Topher Grace). Written and directed by Paul
            Weitz, In Good Company is a
            pretty good, reasonably sharp comedy in the James L. Brooks mold.
            Quaid gives a fine performance, as he almost always does, and Grace
            is far less objectionable than he is on that dreadful 70s
            Show. The movie skirts most, if not all, of the cliches
            and pitfalls you might expect it to fall into. Not what I'd consider
            a great movie by any stretch but certainly an entertaining one.
            (***)
 
 
 Shall We Dance
 
 No, not the J.Lo movie, nor the Japanese original that J.Lo and
            Richard Gere were remaking. This is the good stuff, the 1937
            Astaire-Rogers classic. Fred is the Great Petrov, a Russian ballet
            dancer (actually from Pennsylvania) who, thanks to the usual
            Hollywood misunderstanding and rumor-mongering, is forced to pretend
            he's married to cabaret dancer Ginger. Not my favorite of their
            team-ups but even lesser Astaire-Rogers is great fun. The songs by
            George and Ira Gershwin are all standards now (including "Let's
            Call the Whole Thing Off" and "They Can't Take That Away
            from Me") and the comic relief by Edward Everett Horton and
            Eric Blore is often hilarious. The finale, with Fred dancing with a
            dozen girls in Ginger masks, is a bit on the creepy side but it's a
            minor complaint. While there are plenty of other movies from the
            1930s that stand up over the years, for my money none of them
            transport you so completely back to the era as the Astaire-Rogers
            musicals. (***)
 
 
 Now
            Playing at the Hell Plaza Octoplex - The Brothers Grimm
 
 I've put worse movies in the Octoplex but none quite as depressing
            as this one. For the first time, Terry Gilliam has made a bad movie.
            I've been a Gilliam fan for almost as long as I've been a movie fan.
            I have very good, very concrete memories of seeing every one of his
            films for the first time. None of them are quite this... ordinary.
            Matt Damon and Heath Ledger are the title characters, charlatans who
            go from town to town pretending to exterminate witches, curses and
            assorted other fantastic beasts. They're finally caught and forced
            to do it for real, traveling to a village whose children have been
            disappearing, presumably thanks to a long-dead queen trapped in a
            tower. This sort of thing should be right up Gilliam's alley but for
            whatever reason, it just doesn't work. Most of the blame can be laid
            at the feet of Ehren Kreuger, whose script is beyond terrible.
            Presumably some blame can be given to producers Bob and Harvey
            Weinstein, who apparently forced Gilliam into some creative
            decisions he wasn't happy with. But the sad fact is, this is
            Gilliam's movie. It looks good, often very good, but it's pretty
            clear his heart just wasn't in it. Some directors can take any
            script and make it their own. Some can't. Terry Gilliam needs to get
            back to bringing his own ideas to life, as he did so brilliantly in
            Time Bandits, Brazil
            and The Adventures of Baron Munchausen.
            The Brothers Grimm is the work
            of someone who has been hired by the studio to provide that "Terry
            Gilliam feeling" without actually making a Terry Gilliam film.
            If we're lucky, the best thing to come out of this will be a good,
            candid making-of documentary on the DVD, like Lost
            in La Mancha or The Hamster
            Factor and Other Tales of 12 Monkeys.
            (**)
 
 
 And we're done! I know, I know, another Electric
            Theatre with a paltry six movies. Rest assured I haven't
            been lying down on the job. Keep checking The
            Digital Bits over the next couple days for
            a
              great big new edition of The Bottom Shelf. It's a
            veritable spook-fest this time, all horror all the time, with
            reviews of (get ready... it's a long list) The
            Antichrist, Boogeyman,
            The Church, Cold
            Blood, Curse of the Devil,
            Elvira: Mistress of the Dark,
            Fear No Evil, The
            Guyver, Guyver 2: Dark Hero,
            Hell Night, Hide
            and Seek, The Mangler,
            Red Cockroaches, Return
            of the Killer Tomatoes!, Return
            to Horror High, Saw,
            Sleepaway Camp, Tetsuo:
            The Iron Man, To the Devil...
            a Daughter, Transylvania
            6-5000, Vamp, White
            Noise, and Wishing Stairs.
            I've given more thought to most of these movies than even their
            creators did, so check it out and I'll see you back here again in
            fourteen days.
 
 Adam Jahnke
 ajahnke@thedigitalbits.com
 
 
 Dedicated to R.L. Burnside
 
 "Electric Theatre - Where You See All
            the Latest Life Size Moving Pictures, Moral and Refined, Pleasing to
            Ladies, Gentlemen and Children!"
 
 - Legend on a traveling moving picture show tent, c.1900
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